At the beginning of the school year, I felt rather alone. Not lonely necessarily, but I felt like I wasn’t at the same emotional level as the rest of the people I interacted with in my school. My friends were either too deep or too shallow, and there was no middle ground in which I felt comfortable residing in. I asked my dad, “Why can’t I relate to anyone in high school? Is it because they’re shallow, and am I just more mature than they are?” He responded by saying that it is too narrow-minded to believe that being shallow is bad and being deep is good. He said that I shouldn’t evaluate people in such a black and white way, and that having different perspectives makes the world go around. He also said that “shallow” people can be incredibly deep and “deep” people can be incredibly shallow. Shallow and deep are completely subjective and superficial terms to describe people with multifaceted personalities.
The more I thought about what he said, the more I knew he was right. Who am I to say that being shallow is inherently bad, and that having deep, intellectual thoughts are good? Deep and shallow are such subjective terms, so who am I to judge people for being either? Also, was I shallow for judging other people and categorizing them based on my limited views on their personalities?
It’s remarkable to see the different values of my close friends at school. On the one hand, there’s the super deep one who tries to find meaning in pretty much everything. On the other hand, there’s the carefree one who’s goal in life is to be happy. Sometimes I think my “shallow” friend is so intelligent in that she doesn’t want to deal with things that make her sad. She does as she pleases, and she is able to not overthink situations and maintain her own inner peace. I respect her for that. Because in the end, you can’t care about everything and everyone, and sometimes you just need to live life as it comes.
I enjoy taking what I like from people around me and melding it into who I want to become. I think the friends we choose reflects what we desire or lack in our own personalities and lives. I think friendship stems from being widely different but similar enough, and that we have different friends for different “purposes”.
I want to be both deep and shallow. I want to have deep thoughts and ideas about life, and also be able to shut off my brain and just enjoy life as it goes. Life is as simple as it is complex, and my personality should reflect that.